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Don’t Take Too Long to Get Ready

November 17, 2009

Instead of chasing an airbrushed ideal of perfect, maybe we should spend more time going after natural

- “Chasing Perfect,” Vogue, November 2009

If there’s one thing that seems to frustrate any man, it’s waiting for a woman to finish getting ready.

In order to be live-with-able, you need to be able to get ready from scratch in 30 minutes or less.

When you have time to spare, feel free to spend as much time as you wish.  For rush-rush moments:

Aim to look as beautiful as possible naturally, right out of the bath.

Do not be one of those girls who turn from Ms. Hyde into Dr. Jekyllina after hair products + make-up potion!

Below are tips for both high and low-maintenance girls.

1. FIX Your Problem Areas, Don’t Hide Them



  • Know how to style your hair so it looks good air-driedExample:  apply shine serum and braid, then open when dry for even waves (Cost: minimal)
  • Japanese and Brazilian hair straightening (semi-)permanently recondition hair to be pin-straight and smooth. If you don’t want to waste an hour drying and flatironing, only to frizz up in humidity any way… (Cost: $250-1000)


  • For mascara and/or eyelash curler addicts, eyelash extensions individually glued on by a professional, prescription eyelash growth serum (Latisse), and eyelash perms can help. (Cost: $50-500)

    Do you apply lip plumper, liner, and gloss?  That come off after eating and expose your real mouth? For lasting pouty and perfectly even lips, low-risk temporary fillers or your own fat can help.  Science has come a long way from the old “fish-lipped” results.  Find the most skilled (not cheapest) practitioner for natural, subtle results. (Cost: $500-800)

  • Forget concealer for under-eye hollows, use temporary fillerSkin brighteners help under-eye darkness. If you do make-up contouring “offstage,” cosmetic surgery is a permanent fix. (Cost: $50-8000)
  • For bad skin (blemishes, uneven color, or wrinkles), ditch the foundation mask.  Go to a top dermatologist and start cosmeceutical treatment.  A friend’s husband’s father is a dermatologist and made all the kids in his family use Accutane.  Each has stunning, finely-textured skin. (Cost: $50-300)


  • Laser hair removal or waxing.  Annoying to grow out the hair in between.  But gives a super smooth, small-pored result and save lots of time too. (Cost: $100-$2000+)
  • Lose weight if you have to dress in slimming clothes. Short legs or a long waist are tough, but fat rolls and potbelly are treatable.  (Cost: possibly $$ for trainer or weight loss program)
  • Buy good clothes. Know what fits, cuts and colors look good on you.  Only buy those items so you can pick quickly and be OK.  (Cost: your normal budget. Bonus tip: being skinny makes it easier for clothes to look good)
  • Use moisturizer and exfoliator regularly for soft, smooth skin. (Cost: $5-100+)

Hands and Feet

  • Regular manicures and pedicures.  Do biweekly and don’t worry about  embarrassing tips or toes.  (Cost: $5-100)

2. Get Organized and Get Regular At It

If you buy decent materials and take care of them (no dirty powder puff, unwashed brush and comb, dried out nail-polish), eat and sleep sensibly, remember that cleanliness and neatness are what you are working for, and that they can be attained with ten minutes of washing and brushing a day and a little extra time one night a week, you should never have to scream in anguish and take an hour to get ready when told that your best beau has arrived unexpectedly and is waiting downstairs.

- Jacqueline Kennedy nee Bouvier, Vogue “Prix de Paris” 1951


  • Your living space should be organized for your routine: a place for everything and everything in its place.
  • If you are like me, how you dress is a form of self-expression: your body is your canvas, and your style is your art.  Organize to support your creative energy.
  • But…have outfits in mind so you can grab coordinating items in a rush. Play dress-up in your free time to figure it out (fun!).
  • Follow a regular weekly, biweekly and monthly beauty maintenance routine.

3. Come Up With Your Fast Routine and Memorize It


1. Shower 5 mins.
  • Set out a snack for him to enjoy while he waits (he’ll be happily distracted…for a few minutes at least)
  • Think about outfit to wear (grab any wrinkled options to steam with your bath)
  • Bathe
2. Hair 10 mins.
  • Mentally finalize outfit, shoes and accessories
  • Comb and detangle
  • Apply products
  • Style bangs or other trouble spots
3. Skin care and make-up 10 mins.
  • Skin care essentials (moisturizer and sunscreen; skip the heavy duty stuff)
  • 5 cosmetics only: concealer, eyeliner, eyebrow pencil, powder, lip gloss
4. Get dressed and final touches 5 mins.
  • Dress, check yourself out, adjust as needed
  • Change handbag if needed
  • Smile, you are now ready to join your just slightly annoyed man for some fun!
67 Comments leave one →
  1. Epoxytocin No. 87 permalink
    November 17, 2009 7:47 am

    Bonus tip: being skinny makes it easier for clothes to look good

    This statement needs to be qualified.

    On skinny girls, loose-fitting clothes look good, but tight-fitting clothes look ridiculous.

    On girls whose bodies scream fertility from every luscious curve*, tight-fitting clothes are amazing. These are the kind of girls on whom loose-fitting clothes are like putting the genius kid in the non-honors class.

    *Using the traditional definition of “curves”, not the definition that has been hijacked by fat chicks.

  2. lovelysexybeauty permalink
    November 17, 2009 8:21 am


    Good elaboration, very nice analogy. :-) Skinny curvy (petite yet voluptuous) is the ideal shape to me – the “Jessica Alba” body.

  3. gunslingergregi permalink
    November 17, 2009 9:31 am

    I never rush the old lady when she is getting ready that is her me time.

  4. Dreamer permalink
    November 17, 2009 9:46 am

    This is a cool list, but it seems to promote one set weight standard.

    I wouldn’t say that being “skinny” makes your clothes look better. Actually, as a “thin” woman I envy curvaceous, size 8 – 12 women with hips, T, and A. They wear the clothes and not vice versa. Skinny women make good models because designers want you focused on the clothes and not the girl. Nothing wrong with being sexy and curvy, just as long as you’re toned and in a healthy weight range (not overweight).

  5. November 17, 2009 10:01 am

    One thing that drives me absolutely nuts (in a good way) is a very thin girl with petite endowment in the breastal area, wearing a loose-fitting top in which she is very careful about leaning forward.

  6. Nathan permalink
    November 17, 2009 10:19 am

    Gotta agree with PA.

    Saw a really slim girl today, wearing a loose flowing kaftan over her small frame, held together loosely by a belt under her breast area. Maybe I’m not getting the description across well, but she looked stunning. Sensual and delicate and oozing femininity and grace.

  7. Nathan permalink
    November 17, 2009 10:23 am

    Also I have no idea, referencing your schedule above, how anyone could possibly spend more than 2 minutes on their hair even if they wanted to? On the other hand, I’ve never seen a woman get out of the shower in less than 10 minutes. So I guess it all adds up OK.

  8. November 17, 2009 11:38 am

    Shhhhh don’t tell but I use Accutane. :) My Scottish heritage has given me a lovely, benign condition called Rosacea and Accutane in low doses help me. My skin is very clear as a result.

    I just got back from my mini-holiday and I have to admit I took the most time getting ready – totally a hair thing. I like soft curls in small pieces and it takes 30 minutes. I wasn’t keeping a man ready so I don’t feel too guilty. ;)

    On the size thing I am a curvy size 10 and don’t think it’s hurt me. That said I’d love to be a size 6, I just don’t have the will power. Sigh…

  9. Il Capo permalink
    November 17, 2009 11:56 am

    That said I’d love to be a size 6, I just don’t have the will power. Sigh…

    If you want to get back to your ideal body weight, I suggest you try:

    Instead of starving and counting calories, you just eat right and reap the benefits. I lost 4 inches waist size and 20lbs in just 2 months and did not feel starved at all. I also did very little in terms of working out.

  10. November 17, 2009 12:25 pm

    This is almost more effort than I go through for a big night out. That’s a lot of makeup, especially for trying to get out of the house quickly.

    Nathan, you must have short hair and any gfs of yours must have had straight hair.

  11. Nathan permalink
    November 17, 2009 12:43 pm

    My hair isn’t very short. Using product is surely gay though.

    Granted, the girls I knew who were ‘low maintenance’ all had either dead straight or slightly wavy hair naturally. They also had mid length (some inches past the shoulders) to very long hair. Perhaps if you have short and unruly hair it takes some time to ‘style’. I don’t want to think about this anymore. Goodbye.

  12. Bonnie permalink
    November 17, 2009 2:20 pm

    It always amazes me, the effort most women put in before going out of the house. I usually shower, shave, wash my face, and apply lotion daily. I don’t wear any makeup at all. My hair is long and curly, I wash and airdry it every other day. I think total time caring for my appearance each day is usually 5-10 minutes.

    I do take pains to eat well (super-high-fat diet, adequate protein, no sweets or grains), and because of that I am very toned, shapely and strong with no exercise necessary (although I do try to get it in for health’s sake, but it depends on my mood).

    In reference to above comments: I am very skinny and fitted clothes are essential. I have a teeny waist with (proportionately) curvy hips, but if I wear loose clothes I look like I have a boy-body.

    I really think fitted clothes look better on most women, most of the time. I’m not saying skin-tight, but at least your waist should be outlined, and you should be able to see the shape of either your T or A. The recent empire-waist/babydoll trend is horrendous on most women.. IMO.

  13. СОФИЯ/sofia permalink
    November 17, 2009 2:33 pm

    I like wearing fitted tops because I have big breasts but a smaller waist. Button up shirts, in order to accommodate my bust, are huge on the waist and make me look dumpy. If I were to wear a “flowy top” the shirt would just out after my big breasts, achieving the same sloppy effect.

    A lot of this list requires money, which is something I don’t have. Something to think about.

  14. pervdeep permalink
    November 17, 2009 2:44 pm

    Excellent post LSB! I will be printing out your guidance chart as a bible for my gf. There is absolutely nothing as unsexy as having to wait hours and hours on your girl to get ready.

    For example, when the girl I am with now and I first started dating I would have to speed, skip tolls, almost run over pedestrians, and even dress along the hour and half drive to her place just so I can be on time. Upon arrival…guess what…I would have to sit in my car outside of her apartment waiting 45 min for her to come down already. The first few times I let it slide…as she is HOTTTT, but now it has become quite annoying.

    Initially, I had always wondered what she could have been doing this entire time. As the relationship progressed, I now get to wait on her in her apartment instead of the parking lot downstairs. So what’s the big delay??? Well, for her to get ready, there is a process which includes first showering. Then in between showering and fixing the hair, she finds it imperative to check her work emails, fb, etc. just in case she missed something while she was in the shower. In between the hair and skin care, the email, fb, etc is repeated. Finally, after getting dressed, there is a photo session because mirrors (according to her) just don’t give an accurate reading of hotness. So then, just as you think you are ready to leave, she gets a glimpse of herself in her standup mirror and “Ew……my butt looks too big in these jeans. Let me try on a few other jeans.”

    So as you can see, girls have wavering minds and can’t focus on the task at hand. My 2 cents: Not only should you follow LSB’s chart, but also only focus on the task of getting ready! Avoid doing anything besides getting ready. Get ready and if there is still spare time…then by all means…check your fb, emails, blogs, etc.

    Punctuality is a trait most all guys look for in a potential life partner. No guy wants to spend the rest of his life with a girl who is always going to make him lose the reservation at Carpachio’s, late to the Yankee’s game, to his best friend’s wedding, etc.

    As for my gf, something tells me that after reading LSB’s chart and my comments, she will come around. If not…she just might be too HOTT for me to not complain…?

  15. November 17, 2009 3:03 pm

    Apologies for the long comment, will try to give my thoughts as concisely as possible:

    – Women’s getting ready time = men’s iphone app/check football pool/read news time (hopefully) ;-) P.S. that was a joke, some guys learn how to deal with that time like @Gunny

    – “Skinny” was shorthand for ideal thinnest weight. Minimizing tummy, @$$ AND bust usually all happen together ;-(

    Agree about hourglass figure and super slim and delicate figure looking good. It’s all about making the most of it

    – @aoefe hehe… are you using it over time or just a 3-6 month routine? If you wish to share…I heard that you can just suffer through it once and you’re pretty much clear for life. I’ve been thinking about it… right now I’ve been using Obagi which is pretty strong but works good for me so far

    – Lol Nathan! Oh man…

    Most girls I know take 30-90 minutes to do their hair, when they feel like they’ve done it properly (not just letting it do whatever b/c “I’m just going to class/work, who cares”).

    Straight hair is often flat and needs volumizing and teasing time, full and frizzy hair needs taming and flatironing, etc.

    They say really, really good haircuts from world class stylists allow you to wash-and-go more. And some girls have naturally pretty hair.

    *Most guys don’t realize that the hair you see on a girl usually doesn’t reflect her real hair – color or texture.* Japanese girls naturally have frizzy and wavy-curly hair, not stick-straight hair like the stereotypes. Who knew! ;-)

    * Funny about lot of make-up…I’m a wannabe Make-Up Artist (MUA lol). Part of my creativity and wannabe fashionsita…

    If you go to the pros., from MAC to Bobbi Brown to Chanel, they’ll recommend a bazillion primers, eyeshadows, bronzer, blushes, highlighter, gloss on top of lipstick, diff. color mascaras, etc.

    For a special occasion the professional all those products applied skillfully look great, but so many is crazy for every day. (Some girls do it though…!)

    – About cost… yup, good point @sofia. I removed this from the already long post:

    “Time and money are often interchangeable. To save time, sometimes you have to spend money; to save money; sometimes you have to spend more time.”

    “Cheap desi”-approved stuff I do :
    – Martha Stewart at KMart has the cheapest closet organizer stuff I’ve found. Wayyyy less than Container Store. Ikea is not bad too. I steal ideas from Container Store and Ikea though on how to organize
    – Caboodles has classy organizer cases and pouches, better than what’$ at $ephora
    – With regular maintenance, sometimes you can do hair hot oil treatments on your own or prepare natural remedies
    – It’s better to have just a few really good clothes pieces than a bunch of crapo ones
    – Etc.

  16. November 17, 2009 3:09 pm

    LOLLLLL! xoxoooo LOLLLL I am dying….lollll. Thx so much for commenting Mr.! ;-)

    But hey are you SURE it was 45 mins… a guy once told me waiting felt longer than reality because he was so excited to see her? J/k ;-)

    LOLLL….too funny… I am blusshing now… loll.

    You are a good influence there Mr. smartie :-) So important about trying to FOCUS… I hope your gf learns to “keep her wits about her” more and more. I have a feeling she is really gonna try :-)


    EDIT: P.S. I’m sure your gf is very sorry that you had to wait those times and REALLY appreciates your amazing patience. Hopefully she has, is and will be making it up to you :-)

  17. November 17, 2009 3:35 pm

    Interesting. My routine for getting ready for a date usually takes an hour:

    40 minutes: watch football, SportsCenter, baseball, basketball, hockey

    5 min: shower, get dressed

    5 min: hair, make-up

    10 min: find food while watching football, SportsCenter, baseball, basketball, hockey

    –Boy comes over–

    30 min: watch football, SportsCenter, baseball, basketball, hockey with boy

    I used to take longer getting ready for things until I realized that I look exactly the same if I take an hour or if I take 5 minutes. Plus, I used to try and watch football while doing my make-up. Not easy.

  18. November 17, 2009 3:40 pm

    Most girls I know take 30-90 minutes to do their hair, when they feel like they’ve done it properly (not just letting it do whatever b/c “I’m just going to class/work, who cares”).

    OH MY GOD!!!

    Sorry, I don’t know any girls like this.

    30-90 minutes?

    Even the girls I know who have really high-maintenance hair (I have one friend with SUPER frizzy, curly hair who used to straighten it all before she went anywhere) spend about 15 minutes tops.

    My hair looks exactly the same if I brush it or don’t brush it (b/c it’s stick-straight), so I don’t do anything, but I understand that I am not the norm.

  19. СОФИЯ/sofia permalink
    November 17, 2009 3:50 pm

    My hair is lightly wavy to straight and medium length (a little bit past my shoulders). I take about 5 minutes to straighten it in the morning (if I’m going to work, definitely not class) and I usually let it airdry. I’m just …lazy. But I would probably do more with it if I wasn’t (lazy and cheap).

    Another 2 minutes for makeup (foundation, powder, blush, and lipstick).

    Ten minutes for my shower.

    I’m pretty low maintenance, though my boyfriend would disagree as he once suggested I “just wear sweats”. Yeah. Right.

  20. November 17, 2009 3:57 pm

    I’m pretty low-maintenance…I think the boy probably wishes I was a bit higher-maintenance.

  21. November 17, 2009 4:00 pm

    As for the skinny thing–I think flowy tops and dresses do look good on girls who are rail-thin, if they’re standing in a light breeze. But that’s about it. Otherwise, yeah, fitted clothes ftw.

  22. November 17, 2009 4:09 pm

    I can spend more than an hour doing my hair… It depends. If I wish to curl my hair, it takes time. Also, making some kind of a hairdo really takes time if one isn’t used making them. And I simply enjoy the process itself so I can easily spend like 3 hours getting ready. But, then again, if I have a schedule, I’m almost always ready in time.

    And yes, I do this quite rarely and It’s not a problem to get ready in 30 minutes if necessary, but sometimes it’s just nice to really, really dress up.

  23. Pupu permalink
    November 17, 2009 4:50 pm

    It takes Pupu 5-15 minutes to get ready, including shower and tooth-brushing time. The quickest Pupu has managed to pull off was 8 minutes from the moment she woke up to when she left the door. All that said, Pupu has terrible time management issues. Don’t know where all the time goes! Reading blogs, perhaps :)

  24. Nathan permalink
    November 17, 2009 5:09 pm

    Pupu has the right idea. *smiley face*

  25. СОФИЯ/sofia permalink
    November 17, 2009 5:25 pm

    I love Pupu. Pupu, get in touch with me. Let’s girltalk.

  26. Pupu permalink
    November 17, 2009 5:43 pm

    Pupu loves Sofia too!

  27. tylerdurden permalink
    November 17, 2009 8:09 pm

    DUDE! Go see what Roissy wrote about Hope…….

    Too bad he devoted a post to ripping Hope apart and not LILGRL :(

    Well, I can dream can’t I? lol

  28. November 17, 2009 8:15 pm

    Dude, just write your own post ripping me apart!!

  29. tylerdurden permalink
    November 17, 2009 8:17 pm

  30. tylerdurden permalink
    November 17, 2009 8:20 pm

    You’re not worth the time or effort, LOL. I’d rather delegate that task to somebody else.

    Why are you not defending your bosom buddy Hope? You are conspicuously mum over there at chateau Roissy…….

  31. November 17, 2009 8:24 pm

    If I’m sooo not worth it, why do you even bother addressing me? I’m sure your time is worth less than Roissy’s, anyhow.

    That said, I refuse to comment on that post about Hope. She doesn’t need me to defend her, and I imagine she could care less about what Roissy or any random internetites think of her. Anyway, such idiocy should not be encouraged with a high comment count.

  32. November 17, 2009 9:04 pm

    I don’t know how much time I took this morning but my shirt was inside out. Mortifying.

    I should get more sleep, maybe.

  33. aliasclio permalink
    November 18, 2009 2:35 am

    My goodness, does every woman posting here have her clothes all, always, clean and ironed and ready to wear? Clio’s shower/hair/makeup time is not immense, but ironing her clothes at the last minute can take up to 1/2 an hour.

    You may be relieved to learn that there is one aspect of getting ready that does get easier as you get older, my fellow-females: your skin and hair aren’t so oily/sweaty as when you were in your 20s, so you don’t really have to shower immediately before going out in order to feel clean.

  34. November 18, 2009 3:59 am

    I don’t know how much time I took this morning but my shirt was inside out. Mortifying.

    This totally reminds me of the time when I was at a restaurant with a group of friends, I was telling them about my ‘find’, a designer shirt with my initial on the front. I was loud enough I suppose for a woman at the table behind me to lean over and whisper “nice shirt, but it’s on inside out”. My letter looked normal in the mirror, but was in fact backwards and was showing the inside thread, not the outside. Yes I agree Bhetti – mortifying. Must get more sleep also.

  35. Epoxytocin No. 87 permalink
    November 18, 2009 5:24 am

    Clio –

    so you don’t really have to shower immediately before going out in order to feel clean

    If a girl has a good natural smell, her man should forbid her to shower more than two to three times per week, lest her heady pheromonal perfumes be washed down the drain.

  36. Epoxytocin No. 87 permalink
    November 18, 2009 5:29 am


    – First of all, you also want to make sure that you take long enough to get ready. Especially if you’re going out to see and be seen.
    If my woman and I are going to a club and she tries to get ready in less than, say, 20 minutes, I’ll lay the smack down** and then dictate the terms of her dress code.

    – Also…
    There are actually guys who will get visibly annoyed if you take a while to get ready?

    This is the year two thousand and … um, quite a few. If my woman is taking her sweet time, I have an I-Phone, a portable music player, usually a book or two, and sundry other things to keep me occupied in the short term.
    Unless we’re late to somewhere that won’t let us in until intermission, this is really not a big deal.

  37. Epoxytocin No. 87 permalink
    November 18, 2009 5:30 am

    the footnote:

    **Usually, this will mean the process has to start all over again.

  38. tylerdurden permalink
    November 18, 2009 5:45 am

    “That said, I refuse to comment on that post about Hope.”

    Because you are a hivemind sheep, too cowardly to take a stance that is in opposition to the Roissy crowd, lest the merciless Roissy lens be turned on you.

    “5 min: hair, make-up”

    Ah, that’s why you look so sloppy. Your eye makeup looks like it was applied by a first-grader with Parkinson’s. Maybe you should rethink the 5-minutes-for-hair-n-makeup strategy? You are not the “natural” beauty you think you are…….

  39. November 18, 2009 10:47 am

    Tyler Turden – what’s the deal?

  40. pupu permalink
    November 18, 2009 10:59 am


    Sadly, the need for ironing is eliminated primarily by lower standards, and by iron-free blouses with indestructably crisp collars and a closet full of hangers that allow gravity to work when heat is not pressing. It is really not that bad. Ironing is a luxury — cleaners charge 3X for cleaning lady’s blouses. Only during visits to her parents, Pupu’s entire wardrobe is heat-pressed crisp because mom does the work.

  41. tylerturden permalink
    November 18, 2009 11:27 am

    Bwahahaha! That is genius aofeloofahofe. I am appropriating that, thanks.

    My ‘deal’? I just hate conformist cowards who won’t defend a friend because they don’t want to lose favor with The Cool Kids.

    Also, LILGRL has arrogance that is WAY out of proportion to her looks. I guess it rankles me that a conceited, average-looking (and rather chunky) cunt like her isn’t called out on the Roissyphere, while a more humble, HOTTER girl like Hope gets raked over the coals.

  42. November 18, 2009 11:44 am

    Do you really think we’re not in contact with Hope, Tyler? Rrly? Girls don’t need to fight in the streets, with men no less. Hope knows where our sentiments lie, trust me.

  43. November 18, 2009 12:26 pm

    awesome, epoxy, for pointing out that men are helpless babies who can’t entertain themselves for a few.

    Clio, I don’t even own an iron … and I’m in professional attire at least 5 days a week. Of course, I also usually wear sweaters as offices are always waaaaay to cold.

    And I admit I got involved in the Roissy post.

  44. November 18, 2009 2:31 pm

    Lately I’ve been trying a routine where I have designated laundry and dry clean days each week. Working OK so far except when something comes up the planned day/night… and the next… and the next.

    My lazy trick for getting around ironing is to bring clothes with me in the bathroom during my shower, so most of the wrinkles steam out.

    My other fall back plan if I can’t iron is Downy Wrinkle Release spray. Just a few sprays and a little smoothing, and you can be passable.

    Silks and linen don’t hold up too well without ironing though, and usually require the real deal.

  45. November 18, 2009 4:02 pm


    I guess it rankles me that a conceited, average-looking (and rather chunky) cunt like her isn’t called out on the Roissyphere, while a more humble, HOTTER girl like Hope gets raked over the coals.

    Reread this: you will know who you have a real problem with and it’s not anyone on this blog.

    I just hate conformist cowards who won’t defend a friend because they don’t want to lose favor with The Cool Kids.

    Correct me if I’m wrong but have you voiced your objections to the person who did it in the first place?


  46. November 18, 2009 4:25 pm

    If he says eight o’clock and I’m late, it really is my time management skills. Much worse if you’re not living together. I wouldn’t want to blame him for being irritated about that and not putting up with it if I’m a repeat offender because it’s completely justified if he is; his ability or desire to occupy himself aside.

    My time in getting ready can be hampered (not by the complexity of what I’m actually doing, which a lot of the time I honestly should put more effort in) but a tendency to get distracted by my own thoughts, not noticing that I’ve not moved for e.g. 10 minutes and then forgetting what I was originally doing. Worse if I’m tired.

    I use the braid trick all the time.

  47. Mandy! xD permalink
    November 18, 2009 4:59 pm

    Good advice, overall, but do you know where Latisse (the eyelash lengthening medication) originated?

    It originated from eye drops used to treat GLAUCOMA. That’s what’s in Latisse. Medication used to treat GLAUCOA. Yeah, it’s been watered down, but the longer eyelashes are a side effect of a medication that is supposed to lower the blood pressure in your eyes. Another side effect? It stains your skin, darkening it over time. And you know what else? It can make those pretty blue eyes brown.

    Yeah. So…I wouldn’t advocate using Latisse. Even if it’s watered down. I mean, seriously people, use some sense.


    That’s all I have to say.

  48. aoefe permalink
    November 18, 2009 5:39 pm

    Al – you got involved in a good way. :)

    Loved the Bonnie comment by the by.

  49. tylerturden permalink
    November 18, 2009 6:38 pm

    “Correct me if I’m wrong but have you voiced your objections to the person who did it in the first place?


    Um, I was banned from commenting in Roissy’s comments. D’oh!

    And uh I’m not a hypocrite because I’m not one of Hope’s chums. I’m just a horny anonymous dude who has an e-boner for a hot, sweet Asian girl whose hivemind chick friends won’t come up to bat for her. Cowardly cunts. Didn’t see Bhetti’s or Aofeloofahofe’snames in that thread defending Hope’s honor.

    Yeah, Roissy’s a heel, but he has intelligence and originality to justify his arrogance. I am more bothered by self-impressed twits like LILGRL…..there’s nothing about her that justifies the megalomania. No wit, no originality, and she isn’t as hawwwwt as she thinks she is. (Although from the forehead up she’s a’ight.) People who brag about their IQs constantly = trying. too. hard. Truly gifted people do not need to scream it from the rooftops.

  50. Nathan permalink
    November 18, 2009 7:26 pm

    How does one get banned from Roissy’s? Even ladette raine isn’t banned there. Are you tjf?

  51. Mandy! xD permalink
    November 18, 2009 9:44 pm

    Excuse my language, but that entire hope thing was fucking bullshit.


    Who wants to bet that that pretty girl that roissy keeps posting pictures of dumped him for a younger, hotter alpha? Or…even better, beta?

    Sweet Jebus.

  52. November 19, 2009 12:39 am

    How do you like the name TURDin, cuz you seem kinda constipated.

  53. tylerturden permalink
    November 19, 2009 11:08 am

    I love it aofeloofaofe. Thanks. How jealous ARE you of Bonnie and Dana…..?

  54. November 19, 2009 11:35 am

    I love Dana and she has no issue with me. I don’t know who Bonnie is.

  55. Clarence permalink
    November 22, 2009 9:38 am


    Well this if for teh Menz, to show how superior in time-managment we are to you inferior females :) This post by lsb needs to be spread far and wide across the female end of the internet and retitled. I’m thinking to “How to Get Ready for a Brunch Date in Less than 2 and one half hours, Yes it Can be Done!” And then recognized as the Great Moment in Women’s History that the posting of it was.

    That being said, some clueless omega’s might need the male equivalent. So, because the charming ladies here at Girl Game let all and sundry comment – I count myself in with the sundry- so here goes.

    First guys:

    If you’re taking longer than one minute to get ready you are doing it wrong .

    I mean, some guys go to crazy extremes, take showers or baths, wear pressed clothes (without your girl even IRONING them for you!) put on skin moisterizers, clip their nails this kind of thing.

    Needless to say, chicks find this TRY- HARD.

    So what should you be doing?
    A. Well, your woman’s time is valuable. The longer she has to wait on you, the less time and energy she’ll have for sex after the date. Plus, she’s probably exhausted from ironing those shirts. Provided she remembered to clean them. If she’s new, however, and you haven’t housebroken her I recommend putting on some clothes and hiding any stains. I’ve heard that white out will hide almost anything.
    B. What kind of clothes you ask? Well, you should cover up your bottom and Large Manly Member. Most places these days also require you to cover your manly chest. It’s tough being a man these days when it comes to dress. I admit that holes in shoes look a bit low class and tacky and covering them up with tape painted to look like the color of the shoe is a big bother and doesnt’ work anyway. So, alas, as a man who is suave, sophisticated, and needs to impress your woman, I’m afraid that once your shoes get holes in them, they must be replaced. So just slip those new suckers on and be proud!
    C. If she doesn’t like a beard or mustache I recommend shaving. Otherwise, simply tell her you are “letting it grow”! Works like a charm. Remember, though it is a bother, a happy woman gives good oral.
    D. I don’t recommend anything crazy like a shower..remember her time is valuable! However there are two exceptions I can think of. If Rover mistook you for a light pole, or if you fell into a pile of excrement, it is usually adviseable to take a shower. Unfortunately, this will take you AT LEAST two minutes because it takes the water 30 to 60 seconds to warm, so you must explain to your sweetie pie that you will be a tad late and could she please Stop Nagging and Get you a Beer. And, guys, contrary to popular myth , women LIKE male sweat, so you odn’t need to shower after exercise. Trust me, she’ll love you all the better for standing out in the crowd of brainwashed male schmoes.
    E.Deoderant? Optional in many ways, however this is expected on dates or during social events. So I recommend Old Spice, or Axe. Just not too much. She needs to be able to smell your manly body after all in order to heighten her araul sensation of you.
    F. I sometimes spend a whole minute combing my hair or applying gel and combing it. This is sometimes necessary to give me “That look” but it does tend to increase the time it takes for me to get ready to go out. Thus, I recommend buying the really GOOD mouse. It will hold your hair in place even after you’ve slept on it. A little crazy glue never hurts. Or you can shave your head, esp if your balding. Why care for hair you are going to lose in five or ten years anyway?

    Well there you go. Guys, esp Omegas: Follow my tips and you will have a happier loving girlfriend , and your grooming skills will positively make you a Chick Magnet because , as Roissy would say, they are a form of Social Proof.

  56. November 22, 2009 1:03 pm

    Too funny Clarence! Great job – and very very useful to boot.

  57. November 22, 2009 2:54 pm

    This comment needs to be reposted on your own blawg, Clarence.

  58. Girly Girl permalink
    November 22, 2009 4:47 pm

    Having clear skin and healthy hair cuts down greatly on time spent getting ready. Some personal tips that might benefit someone:

    1) Hair. My hair is thick, curly and frizzy of the Sephardic Jew variety. When you have this, you can’t wash it everyday due to the physiological structure of such hair. Its open follicles mean that water evaporates far more and leaves dry, difficult to manage hair. Shampooing everyday is the kiss of death for curly hair.

    Oh, and coconut oil is the BEST conditioner in the whole world. A jar of virgin oil costs seven dollars and lasts for months. You can either use it as leave in conditioner (use VERY little, though) or as an overnight mask that you later shampoo off.

    2) Skin. I’ve thrown out my facial mosturizers after reading about the chemicals used on them and their damaging effects. Now I use a gentle exfoliante scrub (Burt’s Beeswax ones are my personal favourite), extra virgin olive oil (again in small amounts. You don’t need more than a drop or two), and the contents of popped Vitamin E capsules. And most importantly, drink lots of water! Helps to flush toxins away.

    These tips have worked fabulously for me since starting them four months ago. Everybody constantly compliments me on my skin and hair. Plus, my use of foundation and cover-up has decreased dramatically.

  59. Clarence permalink
    November 22, 2009 11:37 pm

    I like how you always get my name right aoefe. You’d be surprised how many can’t.

  60. November 22, 2009 11:46 pm

    Clarence you and I likely have similar issues with our names being misspelled. I’m glad I’m getting yours right.

  61. November 23, 2009 1:28 pm

    ”””””””””’women LIKE male sweat, so you odn’t need to shower after exercise. Trust me, she’ll love you all the better for standing out in the crowd of brainwashed male schmoes.


  62. tannen permalink
    January 24, 2010 4:57 am

    The barista I talked to the other day had dreadlocked medium brown hair and not a spot of makeup sullying her rosy windblown cheeks and face. Modestly dressed, quirky, smart, and seemingly kind…that is a very beautiful woman in my books. All natural, just lovely. Just my two omega guy cents.

  63. Shamila permalink
    July 15, 2010 6:07 pm

    Hi gals.

    I have been plagued by facial hair for so long and have tried creams, electrolysis which left a black marks on my skin, waxing etc until I found this amazing little tool called Epicare. It is just a lil spring with handles on either side. I love, love, love it. It is so affordable compared to laser where there is still no guarantee that facial hair will be totally gone. For gals who are used to threading this is the perfect D.I.Y. tool. Got mine at I have been using mine for 8 months now.


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